Column

Finding beauty in the brokenness

By Ma. Snyrah Niña Pascua

February 23, 2019

There are so many things that come up in our mind when we hear the word “broken.” It could be a broken dream, a broken heart or even a broken family.

In my case, the word “broken” fits to describe my family. It was more than a decade ago when my concept of family was ruined after my parents decided to separate. I started to hate family days at school, taking family pictures, making of family trees and even Sundays because it is supposedly the family bonding day.

Broken family is not a new concept of topic nowadays; it is widely discussed at work, at classrooms, at the market or even along the streets. But as a person who belongs to a broken family, the topic will always be sensitive and will always pinch our hearts as we talk about it.

I bet no one will ever want to even have just a dream of having a broken family. The transformation of having a perfect family to a broken one is absolutely devastating to the point that you could consider it as one of the biggest nightmares in your life that you do not want to even just have a dream about it.

Growing up with a broken family will always be full of questions and pain; it also surely affects one’s life. There were times that you will be jealous of other person’s complete family and you’ll get hurt all over again at the idea that you won’t experience having a “perfect” family.

It will hurt to the point that you even blame yourself, you convince yourself that it is your fault why did your family gets broken. Or, you even blame your parents because they chose to separate.

But time will come that you will understand it little by little; that it is not anyone’s fault but maybe it is God’s plan for you to be strong, to endure pain full of courage and to use that experience as an inspiration.

Others also say that there is a big effect in a children’s life when they belong to a broken family, and the effect they were talking about is basically a negative effect. Some say that if a child belongs to a broken family it will be rebel or will have no direction in life at all.

It is very easy for them to conclude things up, but one thing I am sure of is that the pain a person endure every day because of a broken family will not be wanted by someone to be felt in any circumstances, the pain is not being felt just for a given time but will be felt and carried of a person in their whole life.

As a person who grows up in a broken family, I took the pain positively. I use the pain as an inspiration in life. Because I believe that it takes a strong individual to face that kind of battle in life. I think all of the pain will not fade away by time but it is by acceptance. You need to accept the fact for you to be able to get along with the process of getting through it.

Having a broken family will not always have to deal on the negative effect of it, you could look to the brighter side of it. Make it as an inspiration to avoid having broken dreams, relationship and maybe sooner family. But, always remember that broken things, ideas and such will always be part of one’s life. You just always need to make the most out of it for you to not regret anything at the end.

To all of the people who belong to a broken family, we are chosen by God to face this kind of battle because he knows that we are the strong one’s to handle such situations. Especially to the children do not let anyone dictate our life just because we belong in the broken family. Make the situation as an inspiration, prove to them that even though you come from a broken family you will succeed in life and do not let blame your parents for the result of your being because as person, you, yourself, are the one accountable in your future.

Lastly, I want to remind you that having a broken family doesn’t mean you do not have a family at all. They are still there even from a far, even though you couldn’t see them often, or even you are not all in the same roof, you are still a family. Maybe your families are categorized as “broken” but always remember above all that there is God who is our family who will never leave us broken.

Remember that there is always beauty in everything, even the broken ones. You just need to find it.