Column

Key to happiness

By James Roger Tesorero

September 01, 2018

Human beings are extremely unique and complex creatures. They have surpassed abundant catastrophes yet they still managed to survive and continue to exist. They have elevated and redefined the standards and skills of the arts. They have advanced the quality of life and health with medicine through science and technology. And they have improved communication to something more understandable and acceptable by the society. It is undeniably obvious that the human species have relentlessly progressed throughout history.

But with all these advancements in scientific knowledge, mechanization, robotics, ease in life, sustainable development and stable ecosystem, how come most are still not contented with what they have achieved in life? How come most are still not happy? When in fact, compared to the life of ancient human civilizations, there are no television, internet, cellphones, telephones, comfort rooms, vehicles like cars and motors, airplanes and a lot more to mention. In other words, we have so much more than what our ancestors have, but why are most are still sad?

It seems like when people are asked the question “Are you happy?” they tend to pause for a moment and ask themselves if they are truly happy, by then, happiness subsides and some answer no or some lie just to avoid further explanation to why they are not happy. it is rare to find someone who is genuinely happy.

Some when asked, “What will make you happy?” The common answers would be, “If I travel the world,” “If I become rich,” “If I’m famous,” “If I’m powerful,” “If I had the new iPhone x,” and so on.

But when you look at it, these so called “happiness” are just temporal and may lead to regrets, sadness and anxiety, because when these goals are not reached, people tend to pity themselves of not being good enough to achieve these dreams.

Other scenarios would be like when these goals have been acquired, the person will feel temporary happiness as it will later fades away because he/ she got used to it and wants to have something else. It’s having the feeling of “now what?” after getting what he/she wanted. When you base happiness as something you acquire from having material things or gaining something, then, that is not genuine happiness at all.

The key to genuine happiness is not from the external factors that affect us— key is our minds. Perception has a large role in the state of happiness. For example, being an optimist results to becoming a positive person therefore having a positive outlook lessens the burden of you having to only look at the whites and grays of life. When you change the contents of your mind or your perception towards something, you will see the great change. Unlike being negative thinkers, they tend to focus on the flaws and wrongs in life which only pile up and lead them to the path of misery.

How to determine if you’re optimistic or pessimistic? Just ask yourselves of what you think challenges are in life. For an optimistic, challenges are opportunities waiting to be unraveled, and for pessimists, challenges are only hindrances that only make life harder that it was before.

Failure when perceived by an optimist means — lesson, but on the other hand when a pessimist experience failure he/she looks at it as a sign to not pursue what she was trying to get thus adding to her list of frustrations and regrets.

You see, having to fix your perception greatly affects the quality of experience you’ll get with life. It is up to you to change how you perceive things.

As what Mahatma Gandhi said, “Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become you values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.”

To which I agree completely, because frankly, we become our words – unconsciously. Just like in a mathematical equation positive plus positive equates to positive while negative added by another negative integer equates to a negative number as well. So if we think of positive thoughts we attract positive energy and that positiveness will help us to be better persons.

We become better persons once we get out of our comfort zones, which is why we need to stay positive in to achieving growth, having a positive outlook in life overcomes fear of failing, fear of doubt which more likely will lead you to genuine happiness.