It’s not the AGE, it’s HOW you DO IT

The characters of Glory and Niko surprised us with their breathtaking scenes. What makes it interesting? the Kiss-swapping makes it controversial I guess. And captivated the viewers because of its erotic and artistic acts. When it comes to love, we all have our own preferences and struggles. When you make a commitment to share the rest of your life with someone else, it isn’t just about love-it’s about respect, compatibility and strong emotional connection. If the two of you see your life moving in the same direction and want to do it together, then the hell with age, right?

There are people who fall in love with someone much younger/older than themselves. But the connections we make aren’t just about our birth date, our favorite colors,  where we grew up or what we do for a living. It’s largely about chemistry: the strongest force of nature that we cannot explain. Sometimes, we fall in love with someone older than us. Before, I got worried if the attraction will fade. But I realized that like wines, I will aged, too. Attractions may fade in some ways but grow in others. If it’s true love, time will only enhance your bond.

We cannot deny the fact that sometimes the society will judge us because of our preference. You will be worried and sad of what other people may say and think about you and your partner. The struggle continues with this kind of environment not accepting an older woman falling in love with a younger man. Who wants to be with a partner who’s ashamed of them? (to be fair with older women and to the cougars). But it is something psychological why some men prefer older women.

According to M. Farouk, Radwan, MSc. on his study on behavior and attraction psychology, there are explanations why do some men prefer older women:

1) In need of a mother figure: Human beings use love to satisfy their most important unmet needs. If a man didn’t get enough nurturing from his mother or if his mother was absent in a way or another then he might start getting attracted to older women. Because the subconscious mind believes that an older woman can provide that man with the love he was deprived of it will make him attracted to older.

2) Childhood & past experiences: Spoiled childrenonly children and the ones who were showered with excessive care might develop the need to be taken care of and this need might remain even when they become adults. In such a case those men might get attracted to older women because they want someone to take care of them the same way they got used to

3) Raising their self esteem: Older women usually have less choices and as a result they become more devoted to their men. This kind of devotion raises the self esteem of that man since the woman he is with idolizes him and showers him with attention.

4) To feel superior: Some men seek older women in order to feel superior. After all managing to attract someone from a parallel world can provide a strong Ego boost to most people. I once met a guy in his late twenties and he was showing off about his ability to attract women in forties. This made him feel special or superior to his peers. This feeling becomes stronger if this woman had a high status and because many old woman have good careers their status is usually higher than the status of younger women.

5) Sexual Fantasies: Men are turned on by sexual novelty and they usually get bored if they remained with the same partner throughout their life time. Men will always go after novel and new experiences if they had the chance. Being with an older woman is one of the sexual phases that many men will pass through and as a result they might find themselves only attracted to them.  

In the end,  you will still decide who will be your  partner “for life” and the opinions of friends and family is normal. Part of the brutal facts. You are lucky. You have met that special someone. But if you think you’re going to be embarrassed or ashamed of your partner in the future, show him/her some respect or call it off now. There is nothing wrong with any age, but there might be other reasons why a large gap in years between partners is not ideal. The inability of either person to deal with it is the biggest one. I’m still hoping for my special someone. Only heaven knows when.

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